Who am I? A few words that I used to describe myself before stating the position as a Leadership Consultant (LC) were: funny, energetic, loving, caring, critical, excited, and nervous.
When I received an email about the position and what it entitled, it felt like a dream come true. My freshman year I devoted time to personal development and had a huge interest in leadership development because of my time in the Leadership and Community Engagement Living Learning Community, especially because my professor, Wendy Wagner, brought life and passion to the course she taught through the LLC. Why was I nervous though? I was nervous because I was both excited and anxious for what the year would hold. The LC position entailed different responsibilities that I was honestly nervous about before even starting.
Since I wasn’t previously involved with LEAD my freshman year, I came into a new environment not really knowing the full climate within the office and how I could add on. My development happened when I tried to work hard in getting used to the flow of the office, going over my responsibilities, and thinking about how my strengths could help me within the LC position. I feel confident that I was able to use my areas of strength to aid me in my new position within LEAD, but my understanding of who I am within this office began, and continues to be, seeing where I have challenge areas and seeking ways to develop them. My self-development therefore was at first a fear of mine: telling myself that I still have a long way to go. After dismantling the façade of perfection I held about myself and my life I began to grasp the reality of where I needed to understand myself better. One of the core challenges that I continue to further develop is seeking assistance when needed and not trying through everything alone. That challenge area is something that I never consciously thought about until being in this position, but after being an LC for months now I’ve come to understand the importance to reaching out in order to not only help lower my stress, but to also help provide more effective programs.
My nervousness has gone away, and that has happened through the support of the LEAD Office. Though many people may not know it, I used to be paralyzed by the fear of the unknown. Sometimes that fear lingers, but by being involved in different LEAD initiatives as both a participant and leader, I have practiced not letting that fear take hold of me. Programs like Leadership Mason Conference and Active Leaders have allowed me to learn about how I can develop myself as a leader trying to overcome personal struggles, and using my personal stories to hopefully empower others as they navigate their personal stories in their leadership development.